“I just know it’s true,” Evan declared, jumping up and down repeatedly, trying to peek over the privacy fence into his neighbor’s fabled lawn. “I’ve heard the stories. Everyone at school says the grass is… Read More »Kid Convinced Grass is Greener on Other Side of Neighbor’s Fence
6-year-old Mark Buffet has posed a question that has left his mother, Nancy Buffet, both bewildered and concerned: “Mom, are there any other fairies like the Tooth Fairy that pay money for human body parts?”… Read More »“Are There Other Fairies Like The Tooth Fairy That Pay Money For Human Body Parts?” Asks Child to Shocked Mom
In a scene not too uncommon in today’s world, local dad Alan Devlin reassured his high school son, Keith, with an enthusiastic “You got this!” to cover for having absolutely no idea how to help… Read More »“You Got This” Assures Father Who Doesn’t Know How To Help with His Son’s Algebra Homework
In a quiet suburban neighborhood where minivans outnumber streetlights, a group of women have been ingeniously disguising their love of wine as a book club. While their intentions may be transparent to everyone else, these… Read More »Local Mom’s Wine Club Cleverly Disguised as a Book Club, Fools No One But Themselves
Local dad Peter Hopkins expressed his utter dismay today that his 10-year-old son, Cadbury, still hasn’t grasped the biological impossibility of rabbits laying eggs, even after yet another Easter has come and gone. “I mean,… Read More »Local Father Appalled as 10-Year-Old Son Still Clueless About Easter Bunny’s Egg-Laying Abilities
Local woman Jessica O’Malley, age 39, embarked on a daring home renovation project this week, impulsively stripping and painting her kitchen cabinets a trendy shade of sage green in a desperate attempt to fill the… Read More »Local Mom Paints Kitchen Cabinets a Trendy Sage Green In Attempt To Fill Gaping Void In Soul
In a chilling glimpse into the future of maternal instincts, 8-year-old Emily Andersen treatment of her pet hamster, Mr. Whiskers, has reportedly sent shockwaves through their sleepy suburb, raising concerns about her potential parenting style… Read More »Treatment of Pet Hamster by Girl Chilling Foreshadowing of How She Will Parent Her Future Children
Nosey local woman, Sofia Snoopington, spent the better part of Saturday morning staring out of her living room window, pondering the profound question that she assumes the whole neighborhood is wondering: Is Shelby Stashmore next… Read More »Woman Contemplates Whether Neighbor is Organizing a Yard Sale or Undergoing a Hoarding Intervention
Local man Greg Kelly found himself in an existential crisis Thursday evening, wondering whether his yearly date night with wife Emily warranted tucking in his shirt. This comes amid rumors that he might default to… Read More »Husband Contemplates Whether Yearly Date Night Requires Tucked In Shirt
After seven long months of exile from his beloved dog park, a Golden Retriever named Bark Twain, has expressed his grievances, saying that while baby food scraps are a decent consolation, they are “nowhere close… Read More »Family Dog Has Not Been to the Dog Park Since Baby Was Born
