Local father Tom Harris, 46, recently made the heart-wrenching decision to sell the family’s cherished cabin up north to accommodate his son Billy’s incessant desire to play the most expensive positions in high school sports.… Read More »Minnesota Dad Sells Family Cabin to Fund Son’s Obsession with Most Expensive Sports Positions, Awaits Pro-Athlete Payday
10-year-old Ollie Tabooger announced Monday that he is “absolutely going to fight back” against his older brother, 14-year-old Johnny Tabooger “once he’s had just 6 or 7 more beatings.” “Mark my words, I’m going to… Read More »Little Brother Declares He’ll Fight Back After Big Brother Beats Him Up Just 6 or 7 More Times
Local man Greg Kelly found himself in an existential crisis Thursday evening, wondering whether his yearly date night with wife Emily warranted tucking in his shirt. This comes amid rumors that he might default to… Read More »Husband Contemplates Whether Yearly Date Night Requires Tucked In Shirt
There’s a up-and-coming political star that is making waves on the local level, 5-year-old Jerry Manders from Chicago, Illinois, has been identified as a lying prodigy with a skill set so advanced that he is… Read More »Jerry Manders, 5-Year-Old Prodigy Liar, Already Hailed as Future Political Star
After seven long months of exile from his beloved dog park, a Golden Retriever named Bark Twain, has expressed his grievances, saying that while baby food scraps are a decent consolation, they are “nowhere close… Read More »Family Dog Has Not Been to the Dog Park Since Baby Was Born
Ticketmaster unveiled its revolutionary new “Pay-to-Play” daycare system today, in which parents can customize their child’s daily care experience based on a variety of subscription packages. “We believe in personalization,” said Tiffany Floyd, director of… Read More »Hugs for Sale: Ticketmaster’s New Daycare Turns Childcare Into a Pay-to-Play Experience
In a revelation that has left northwest Iowa’s local community both stunned and scratching their heads, high school football sensation Ed “The Bulldozer” Benton has been unmasked. It turns out that the teen prodigy is,… Read More »Fumbled Identity: High School Football Star Unmasked as 23-Year-Old
Ten-year-old Simon Sess, unfortunately named after a classic children’s game, expressed his deep hatred for his name. Due to the relentless teasing centered around “Simon Says,” the child is now considering changing his name to… Read More »Simon Says He’s Had Enough! Local Boy Considers Name Change to Rover to Avoid Teasing
This new product in development has parents curious and diaper manufacturers scared. SC Johnson has announced the development of a groundbreaking new product: Ziploc diapers. Merging their mastery in airtight seal technology with the world… Read More »New Ziploc Diapers: Secret to Success or Hot Mess Express?
If life gives you lemons, be sure to not give them to the little kid in my neighborhood because his lemonade stand is an embarrassment. I was out for a casual stroll on a sunny… Read More »Opinion: Why Buy Lemonade From This Kid’s Lemonade Stand When I Can Make Better At Home?
